Retired Gunnery Sergeant Terri Collins
In movies, female Marines are shown as tough, aggressive women with hair pulled back in a severe bun. They wield machine guns and throw men twice their size around the room. We hardly ever see them eating pizza while their children run around Chucky Cheese, or sitting in the park watching their children play on a swing set. Don’t get me wrong, you don’t want to be in a fight with a female Marine. They are tough, no doubt about it, but many are mothers too. If you live in Beaufort, SC chances are some of your neighbors are Marines. You might even live next door to someone like retired Gunnery Sergeant Terri Collins who raised three children, twin boys Demetri and Dante and daughter Torii, during her 20 years of service in the Marine Corps.
Young men and women from across the country rush from vans onto the famous yellow footprints Sept. 22, 2014, on Parris Island, S.C (Photo by Cpl. Caitlin Brink)
Terri’s long hair is no longer restricted to a regulation bun; today it is loosely tied back. She sits in an upholstered chair in her living room paging through a large D-ring binder and removes a clipping from The Boot, the now defunct Parris Island newspaper. “This is the article about boot camp it says, Platoon mates reunite after 20 years…the Lt Col was in boot camp with me and then she did my retirement ceremony on the yellow footprints 20 years later where she was the Battalion Commander for 4th battalion.” Retiring on the Depot brought Terri full circle in a career that started at the age of 17.
Making the choice to join the Marine Corps was a natural decision for Terri who grew up in a military family; her father, grandfather and uncles were all in the Navy. She loved the lifestyle and wanted to do something similar. After graduating high school she spoke with a recruiter and found out about the Marine Band.
“… I had a scholarship to go to college for band and I thought well why not go in the military, travel, get out of my parents house, see the world and still play in the band. And get paid to play instead of pay somebody to let me play.”
Corporal Dalton Lee, a musician with the 1st Marine Division Band, from Camp Pendleton, CA, plays his sousaphone as he crosses a street during the band’s performance in downtown San Francisco (Photo by Sgt. Joseph Scanlan)
After boot camp, she went to the School of Music but concern over her ability to carry a 44 lb tuba in the marching band changed the course of her career. “They wanted me to learn play a smaller instrument and gave me 6 months to learn to play it at the same level I play the Tuba, which was harder to do than you’d think, so I didn’t play it as well.” She had the option of getting out of the Corps or taking another MOS. Terri said, “I don’t want to get out, I want to travel and see the world; I came in to travel and see the world so I said give me whatever job you have.” So she became a cook and worked in mess halls thorough out the Marine Corps.
Terri married, had children and she and her Marine husband balanced dual careers for 13 years before her marriage ended in divorce. Part of her balancing act included finding a solution when things didn’t go as planned. On one occasion when the twins were small, she had to be at work at 3:00 am. She scheduled a babysitter to watch her children, but when she knocked on the babysitter’s door several times no one answered. Knowing that she had hungry Marines to feed and calling in was not an option, she scooped the boys up and brought them to work with her until the Child Care Center on base opened.
Terri learned to adapt to ever changing situations like what to do when she received unaccompanied orders to Okinawa, Japan. “You have to have a plan and then a backup plan.” Terri told me. Her plan included sending the boys to live with their grandparents in Puerto Rico and enrolling the twins, now 4 in kindergarten there. Her backup plan included sending them home to her parents if Puerto Rico didn’t work out.
A recruit from Fox Company, 2nd Recruit Training Battalion, grabs a dessert. (Photo by Lance Cpl. David Bessey)
But the twins did well in Puerto Rico and after a year, Terri requested orders to bring them to Japan. At first Demetri and Dante spoke only in Spanish and she had to use what little Spanish she knew to communicate with them. Gradually they adjusted to their new environment. “I think kids are pretty resilient. When they are away from you,” her voice cracks a little as she says, “…you miss the little things, their little cute things. And children change a lot. They change quickly. They look so skinny or they look so different when their grandparents send pictures and you look at them and think ‘Oh my Gosh what happened to them they look so different!’ I missed it. I even missed the little kindergarten graduation.”
Gunnery Sgt. Charles Maddox eats with his children Maya and Taiki Maddox during the Month of the Military Child Picnic at the Child Development Center at Marine Corps Air Station Beaufort. (Photo by Pfc. Brendan I. Roethel)
Finding quality care and being away from ones family is a common occurrence even in today’s Armed Forces. According to a special report released by the Office of the President in 2011, “Military families face challenges that are not found in other work environments. Shifting work schedules that are often longer than the typical 8-hour day, as well as the ever-present possibility of being deployed anywhere in the world on a moment’s notice, require a child care system that is flexible and maintains high quality standards.” The report goes on to acknowledge that while military children “are often described as a resilient group, the cumulative effects of multiple moves and significant parental absences can erode this resilience.”
U.S. service members, children, and teachers pose for group photo June 13 during the service members’ visit to Ohira Manyo Kindergarten, Sendai, Japan. (Photo by Sgt. Jose O. Nava)
But there are some advantages to moving frequently. Throughout her career, Terri’s children traveled and explored different cultures and different environments. In Okinawa, daughter Torii attended Japanese Kindergarten at the age of two. Teachers taught her Japanese, she learned their customs and ate local food. “It is part of what my parents taught me; you try a little of everything and if you don’t like it then you don’t do it again.” Besides living in Puerto Rico and Japan, the children traveled with Terri by motor home from Idaho to Beaufort visiting landmarks like Mount Rushmore and the Grand Canyon along the way. Each duty station provided unique vacation opportunities. Terri did her best to make sure changes in duty stations enriched the lives of her children.
As a young girl Terri loved the idea of traveling around with her Navy father even though her sister did not. But when dad retired and moved the family from Virginia Beach to Idaho right before her senior year in high school Terri had to adjust to a whole new school and only one year to get to know everyone. She didn’t have time to form close relationships with her new friends. “Why would I go to a class reunion when I don’t know the people in Idaho and they don’t know me? I have a friend there, but everybody I knew from 6th through 11th grade is in Virginia.” Ever mindful of her own experience, Terri stayed in Beaufort so her children could finish high school without changing schools.
How do Terri’s children feel about their mom’s career choice? They are proud of her. And despite all of that moving around everyone is doing well. Daughter, Torii is currently living with her father while attending community college. She does not want to become a Marine but she loves what her mother accomplished. One of the twins works in construction; the other became a Marine and teaches the Basic Recon Course in San Diego.
Rct. Tyequifa E. Elmore, Platoon 4016, Papa Company, 4th Recruit Training Battalion, lands a winning blow on her opponent during a pugil stick match March 4, 2015, on Parris Island, S.C. (Photo by Sgt. Jennifer Schubert)
After spending 20 years in the Marine Corps Terri says that joining the Corps is probably the best thing a young woman can do. “Even if they join for only one tour before finding out it is not for them. You learn confidence, self-reflection, empathy, and how to see things from other people’s point of view.”
Terri is proud of her time in the Marine Corps and sums up her feelings this way, “There are a few good men and there are even fewer good women, so there’s no better experience that you could have whether you do 20 or you do just that one 4 year tour because it’s going to give you a boost of confidence to say look I can do anything. ”
Terri Collins works full-time on Parris Island. During her free time she continues her adventures by taking trips in her motor home, riding with her friends in a local motorcycle group and visiting family.
Sgt. Trelaine S. Buffaloe, a martial arts instructor, motivates Rct. Keyla M. Sanchez, Platoon 4017, Papa Company, 4th Recruit Training Battalion, during a pugil stick match March 4, 2015, on Parris Island, S.C. (Photo by Sgt. Jennifer Schubert)
So the next time you see a female Marine in the movies fighting off 3 or 4 men as she makes her way to the alien space craft to set off some high explosives, remember after she’s done saving the day she probably picks her kids up from daycare and heads home to make them dinner and get them ready for school the next day. And if you live in Beaufort, she may be the Gunnery Sergeant living next door.
